Wednesday, August 03, 2005

Some background info...

For those of you that don't know...

I am 32, overweight and childless. I was married for a few years way back when. Luckily we did not have children. I would have been forced to do something crazy, like kill myself AND the child....You think I am kidding? I'm so serious that it hurts. It was THAT bad.

Anyway...I am now relocated and remarried and no longer crazy. I have been trying for about 4 years to lose some weight. I will never be a size 5 and I am ok with that. I would be happy with a size 14/16 to be completely honest.

I do not over eat. I exercise, I drink lots of water. I was doing everything that I was supposed to be doing. I can never lose more than 10 pounds. And even that 10 takes FOREVER to lose. I never stuck to any kind of really healthy ways of eating for more than 6 months at a time, because it didn't do anything for me. I figured "What the hell?! Might as well eat what I want!"
Bad choice, I know.

I had gone off the Pill last October. I had figured that since I really wanted to lose some weight, I would get pregnant immediately, thus thwarting any weight loss plans I had in mind. That was not to be. In November I had my yearly appointment. I told my Doc at that point that I had gone off of the Pill, and that my periods immediately went wonky. They did not do that the last time I went off of the I was wondering if anything was wrong. She immediately wrote out some prescriptions.

I hate taking Pills. My Primary had put me on Prozac awhile back because he had diagnosed me with PMDD - Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder. That did not last long. I got fed up with taking them so I stopped. These meds that she was putting me on would help to regulate my periods, would make me ovulate and would help me to lose weight. Fine. At this point I am thinking about how I am 31 years old, ain't getting any younger...I will do what I gotta!

The hormone pills she put me I cannot believe how super incredibly bitchy they made me. And the other pills? They gave me awful gastrointestinal issues. It got to the point that I could not eat. So....I stopped taking everything.

I know I know...

I met with a fertility Doc the other day who was wondermous. I have to go back on those pills..that is just the way it goes. He also told me that I never needed Prozac, that the reason for my extreme mood swings was due to my body making too much insulin. When I do not eat right, I get super agitated, angry and short tempered. I never realized that my moods and my eating habits were related, until I really thought about it. Amazing, really.

So, next week, after my husband and his crew are out of my house and in their own office space, I shall start my routine. Up early, breakfast, biking, Pilates, housework, goofing off, lunch, swimming, yard work, swimming, dinner, walk/bike.

I have to have some bloodwork done when I start my period this month to see what is going on with the hormones. After that we will go the route of the meds, I guess. The Doc diagnosed me with mild PCOS and said that in due time I should have no problem getting pregnant.

So that is where I am at. We nookied the other day, and then I had pains like I usually get when I DO ovulate...then yesterday I had some spotting. So of course I am thinking "OMG...could I be?"

Then common sense kicks in and tells me to shut the hell up.


welcome to the roller coaster...
Glad you found my second site, didn't know anybody came there anymore.

Nice to meet you, glad to be starting the journey "with" someone.
I'm an ass, I didn't know it was YOU!

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